Volunteer
(for her - Spring '98)

We met before the sun went down,
When the sky was rosy, the leaves were brown, uh-huh
Every Tuesday it would be the same,
And I didn't even know your name, uh-huh
I asked you for the numbers and you didn't think twice,
Well you always went against good advice, uh-huh

I'd volunteer for anything you want me to do
And I was thanking God I saw the world again in you
And I was remembering all the things, the things I thought I knew
I still remember the time - I fell in love with you

We met before the world was young,
When all these songs had yet to be sung, uh-huh
Winter came and the rain fell down, and I was walking into town, uh-huh
You drove right by and you gave me a ride,
and I had to get in and swallow my pride, uh-huh
And I was feeling lonely
And I was feeling pain
And I was walking home from class in the dirt and the muck and the rain
And I looked up and saw you there
You were walking the other way
You skipped your class that day

Free
(for me - Spring '98)

I look at her - she looks at me
Nothing will ever come of this, so I'm free
I close my eyes - I bend my knees
I don't really want to be, but I'm free

I'm free, you can throw that stuff away
I'm free, I never needed it anyway, 'cause I'm free

It's a new day - maybe I can think new ways
Well, I tried to follow you, but all these feelings stuck like glue
To my soul
There's a crossways -
I can see it through the dust haze
I can only go two ways - and I know
I'm standing on a bridge over troubled waters
And all my possessions are floating away
Can't say I'm braver, can't say I'm smarter
But maybe I found a place to stay - and I'm staying right here

It's an old town - all these people are running 'round
They got their feet stuck in the ground and
They are crying, crying, crying, crying
It's a new sound - I don't want to be flesh bound
I want to be astounded, yes
I want to be astounded

 

She Found You
(for lovesick teenagers - Winter '97)

Lying in bed, on a Sunday afternoon
Blankets lying on the floor
I'm feeling lonely now, and the days go by so soon
And nobody's knocking on my door
So much potential wasted, lying in the gloom
So many things I did not do
I'm though with living lies, and painting empty rooms
I'll tell you the story of a girl - I never knew

I don't know where she's going, don't know where she's been
I'm not presumptuous any more
She lives in a world of wisdom, and beauty's what she gives
But I know that I can't cross that shore

And if you see her, know this now:
You don't know what she'll do or say to make you lose your cool
You might not notice for a while
But bit by bit you'll realize that you're losing your control
'cause she found you

Sitting alone, on the balcony at noon
Watching the geese go flying by
I try to forget about her, don't know what to do
But I know I can't live this lie
I got her within me now, a flame in my inside
But I can't claim her as my own
I got to release her now, and let her choose her mind
To reap the seeds, I have to sow

 

Mighty Times
(for newlyweds - Summer '97)

I always knew this would happen
I just didn't know where or when
Is this the normal reaction to the thoughts of where I've been

You always change your expectations
Except for a big surprise
I should have expected this when I tried you on for size

And you know what they say ain't true
I'll still always love you, with no apologies
And I'm glad God saved you for now
I still don't realize how you came to be with me, 'cause you're

Too much to be so few, too good not to be true
I'm looking forward to some mighty times with you
Too real to be so far, you're too close to be a star
I'm looking forward to some mighty times with you
Some mighty times with you

The second verse already
There's still so much to tell
It seems so easy to go on, let the feelings of love un-quell

The greatest thing just happened as
I sat by the waterfall
You pushed me in, I swallowed all the pride that I never saw

And I saw the real McCoy, and I nearly burst with joy
As I swam within your eyes
And I knew just what to say, and I threw my idols away
And I'm not afraid to die

You showed me things that I always thought I saw before
We sailed our shiny ship into the silver shore
Just when I thought that I would never ever laugh again
You let me know that it wasn't a sin…

 

Some Go Down To Texas
(for a friend - call me - Winter 2000)

You never seemed quite real, you seemed to
Come out of the night
But such a golden light seemed to come from you
I wrote out all my jokes and you reviewed and started to laugh
And the sound sent such a quiver like it used to
When will I see your face again?
Last time we met you laughed and said
"When the cows come in"
I heard you moved to Michigan
Another friend comes tumbling down like another bowling pin

Well, some go down to Texas, some go walking with the Lord
Some go charging down to foreign lands with upraised shield and sword
Some will fly to Paris, France and walk the streets of Rome
And I wonder now, how many will come home

Well I first left my hometown when I was 17 years old
I went to Jersey, where it's cold, and the devils rule the land
I've flown across the ocean and I've met a lot of souls
I have seen them wander, from above, across the burning sands
But I've never been to a place where I am free
Sometimes I wonder if such a place is just the stuff of dreams
So I'll stop by a church on the way and I will kneel
And I'll pray I find a place where all the dreams are really real

Well, there's a God in heaven and he gathers all the kids
Like a great old babysitter in the sky
And I'm still walking down below and the journey hasn't ended
But I know things will be mended, even after I have died
We will walk together, though we are alone
And the flimsy bonds between us will last longer than the stone

And beyond that hill there's still a promised land
Where the angels shout, kick the devils out,
And we'll feel his mighty hand

 

Patching Things Up
(for an ex - Summer 2001)

Well I think that we've both done a good bit of working for the day
And I think that you're in no mood to wander off and play
So just sit down with a good cup of coffee
And a book of Indian poetry like you wanted to

Well I think that we've both done a good bit of fussing for the week
And I think that you don't know when to get off of your feet
And I know that you don't like orders
So you can go and do whatever the hell you wanna do

And I know that you don't like orders, so I'll ask this as a favor
Maybe you can't do it now, so I guess I'll ask you later
You're always saying that I ask so much and this ain't changing pace
But all I ask is to sit and listen with that cold look on your face

Let me take care of you, all those long and steamy days
Let me take care of you, you don't need to change your ways
But it ain't good for you, and I've been looking through the haze
At the face of you

I realize that you don't need nothing from a messy bum like me
I know I screwed up so bad that you're so glad to be free
I know you're gonna go to foreign lands and slide along the sea
Like you always wanted to

I see how much you've grown up since the last time you were mine
Sitting up late with your friend, mixing, drinking coffee and wine
I know you're not like other folks, 'cause you're happy all the time
Being sad and blue, being sad and blue like you

All I'm trying to say is I see you working in the fields and on the table
No one ever said that you were shirking and you laugh till you're unable
To stop, sit down, relax a while, and settle for a change of pace
Stop, lie down on that long blue couch with that weary look on your face

Now don't you think that I'm giving up on my absolute despair
I know I'll never again be allowed to run my fingers through your hair
But you're carrying around so much misery
And I'm asking you to share a little feminine blues

And if you ask me what I really want, I guess I'd answer this
To see you bedded down on that couch in a state of absolute bliss
And when your arms are full, to give me a little bit of your distress,
And I'll feel sad too - I'd be happy being sad with you

So honey just allow me one more chance to get along with you
I'm gonna play country songs outside your window until I pull on through
And maybe deep down inside you'll really want me to go away
But that's one thing I just can't do - too bad, I'm gonna stay

 

Rescue Me
(for another ex - Winter 2001)

We were walking along on a winter day
Your boots were gold and my face was gray
We're talking 'bout love and jealousy
Well I don't think much about relationships
When I got my hands around your slender hips
But I don't want you to be another casualty
I would spend every lonely night with you
But I'm too old to live by the devil's rules
And I'm lucky too much to take it for granted
'Cause I've seen fire and I've seen rain
I've seen love, frustration, disillusion and pain
And now I find my feet are too well planted
Well I guess I'm what people would call a square
I get in bad situations but I don't care
You always think that I'm just joking
You don't think so much about all your pain
When your fingers are tracing my big blue veins
And you'll be laughing and I'll be moping
I would spend all my money to show you the world
But I don't have any, so I'll use yours
You'll always be my little sugar mama
And once every week you start to fuss and cry
You say you hate me, go to hell and die
You know I would, but I don't wanna
You try to give me one reason to stay away and I'm leaving
You try to convince me but you're just not succeeding
I won't be heeding, 'cause I'm flying off the edge and I'm blown out to sea
Won't somebody come and rescue me

3-legged Cat
(for the kids - Summer '96)

3-legged little cat
on the front porch,
keeping mice away

blackness is all I can see,
in front of me
- that's all that I can say

and my flop-eared little dog,
he's still fast asleep,
and the house is really quiet
and I can't think of what to do
in summertime, summertime

and I know it's no use whining and complaining
about the lost equality
and I know it's no use packing up and quitting
just 'cause she's flown away from me

you gotta move on, oh brother can't you see
you gotta move on, that she was never meant for me
you gotta move on, oh brother can't you see can't you see -
that she is dead to me

sitting in the living room, sunlight on my face,
and my brother's outside mowing
Danny's watching MST in front of me,
and the flowers aren't growing

and I'm sitting on the porch thinking silly things
that could never really happen
but I can't think of what to do
in summertime, summertime

 

An Hour In Time
(for Brian and Aaron - with Phil Costanzo, Spring 2001)

When we last met, you were bright and beautiful
And I saw you standing there alone
But you're not coming home, you're not coming home

And I saw you by the lantern's deepest light
And I saw you walk into the night
But not without a fight, not without a fight

Couldn't even stay for a while, couldn't even stay for a while, couldn't even stay for a while, couldn't even stay for a while.

And I saw you in the green and grassy plain
But I never saw your face again
I can't stand so much pain, can't stand so much pain

And you fell beneath the white and blooming flowers
And the rain fell on your face in showers
How we searched for hours, how we searched for hours

Where, oh where do you lie, where oh where do you lie?
Stay, stay for a while, stay for a while Stay, stay for a while, stay for a while

No, no, no, no, no. No, no, no, no, no, no.
No, no, no, no, no. No, no, no, no, no, no.
Couldn't even stay for a while, couldn't even stay for a while
Couldn't even stay for while, roll me down, roll away
Roll me down, roll away. Roll me down, roll away
Roll me down, roll away.

Come Back Home
(for skeptics - Winter, 2002)

I walk the hills in the footsteps of morning
And I see your love come crashing to the shore
And then the dust comes in without warning
And I think that it's the wind and nothing more
Just the air that moves the water to the shore

I get the praise for my new vibration
And I sit back here and suck up all the love
And then I get a strange new sensation
That there's more than air and molecules above
More than air and dust and molecules above

I know it's no excuse to take a fall from grace
But I can't see your face, yeah
And as I look over the ruins of this jewel-set town
All these questions still arise, and all these questions they fall down

And they fall down I get in these awkward situations
Where it doesn't matter what I do or say
And I hear the cry of my generation
The quiet cry of those who were born right out of the grave

And I hear them cry like they still have souls to save
In my life, there's always been a threat of tragedy
But you know, it never touches me, yeah
And so I walk with my boots on and my head held high
But I know I don't deserve it, and all these questions still I cry

And I say: Who made the morning and the evening?
Why did you place me in this world?
I'm looking for rhyme and I'm looking for reason
But I see your light come shining through and I'm free

I come back home to you
I never dared to ask you why you let her bleed
I only ask for the things I need, yeah
And as I look into the window of your stained-glass eyes
All these questions, they come up, and all these questions still arise

 

Thank You Jesus
(for God - Spring '96)

This isn't the way it should be
But why do things always turn out this way
Once again I turn back to you
But why can't I be more strong?
This isn't the way it should be
But why do things always turn out this way
Once again I turn back to you, and I beg you, Lord, forgive me
And I know I can't live without you
But still I turn away
And I know that you're bleeding for me
But still I choose to stray
How could you love me? How could you serve me?
How could you wash my feet? How could you die for me?

This isn't the way it should be
But I always twist the meaning, and I know where this will lead
But I trust in my own pride
This isn't the way it should be
But I feel life has no meaning and I slowly hide my face
And turn to my inside
And once again I drown in nothing, and wallow in my mud
And once again I let you wash me in tears and precious blood
You came for me, you set me free, you freed me from anxiety
The mystery, that puzzles me, it's so much more than I can see
You gave me life, you gave me breath, you saved me from the second death

The mystery, that puzzles me, this strange new savior on the tree
I lift my filthy face up to you, and feel your cleansing rain
I let your mercy burn right through me, and take away the pain
Thank you Jesus, more and more, every day I thank you more
Gave me freedom, gave me breath, saved me from the second death
Thank you Jesus, more and more, every day I thank you more
Gave me freedom, gave me breath, saved me from the second death

 

The River Song
(for you - Spring 2001)

Here's some lines I wrote when I was dying to ease my soul
Sometimes it seems I go through so much purgatory and nobody knows
Well I got a job, and I got a band, and I guess my parents don't understand
Why I live so poor
And I had a girl, but she dumped me
- I guess she finally came to see
Just what am I dating him for?
I went to school and I got a degree, but it don't mean that much to me
Now that I think about it
'Cause after all the bills I paid, I don't feel any smarter guess
I could live without it -

I gotta run down the river, down the river, till it comes home to the sea and God say: when you have crossed the world twice over, will you still come back to me

Here's a song I sing when I am crying to soothe my soul
It's got a little bit of blues and a little bit of grass
And a little bit of my old friend, rock 'n roll
I sing 'cause I want to be a star, so I play in all these sweaty bars
To strike it gold
Maybe old Pete was right when he said you gotta die
Before you get weak and old
So I sit on the stool and I sing my songs and If you like 'em you can sing along, and I hope you do
But if you don't I'm gonna keep on playing and I won't stop until I'm good and through - woo hoo.
And when I'm done I'm gonna-

Sometimes I get this crazy idea that I wanna go down and live in NYC
That great big apple down by the bay where life is short and death is pretty
Other times I wanna find a pretty young girl to make my wife
While I'm still young and able
We'll walk together through these fields of grass and
Make love underneath the breakfast table. I gotta-

Every time I find a place to stay, the river washes these roots away
And I'm floating down
Every time I climb a higher tree, the wind blows it out from under me
And I'm falling down
It's been a long time since these old feet and toes have felt
The healing touch of solid ground
And every time I think I might stick around
These people get annoying and I'm out of town
Well I went down the rive to New Orleans and I met a girl
Who had two or three abortions
I wish I could lend her a helping hand, but I was too busy
Going through the motions. I gotta-

Maybe some day my name will be in lights,
Saying one night only, one night at the Met
But I gotta keep strumming this old guitar 'cause obviously I haven't got there yet. I gotta-

 

Strumming on the streets of Syracuse...